Who decides our worth? Discussing locus of evaluation
October 2026
by Mervin Straughan
For some years, experts have been warning that the carefully curated lifestyles of social media can pressure psychologically frail users to measure up and strive for the Instagram-perfect body, home, and relationship.
If we allow them, these platforms shape our self-worth and encourage us to rely on approval of others, taking cues from an influencer culture that tells us that life is about aesthetics, monetising, and performance.
That said, social media’s follower and thumbs-up gains are only a recent means of seeking validation.
Shaping us has been going on since birth
Achievement systems and education equate academic performance with personal value and a teacher’s ill-judged comment can last a lifetime, and our belief systems encourage us to adopt a particular stance on morality otherwise we risk judgment or exclusion.
Meanwhile, conditional love or approval from families and upbringing can lead to behaviours that are intended to meet approval. We might also take on board our parents’ values around emotional expression and roles.
In the workplace, self-worth might pivot on what our bosses tell us while imposter syndrome prompts comparisons with peers and fuels inner doubt.
In the therapy room: locus of evaluation
It’s common for clients to enter the counselling room shaped by years of meeting or attempting to meet the expectations or conditions of worth of others. This is known as having a strong external locus of evaluation.
Locus of evaluation is a psychological concept in person-centred counselling that refers to the place from where we make judgments about ourselves, others, and the world. Carl Rogers introduced the concept and it’s a key means of understanding how we develop our self-worth and approach decision making. It can be internal or external.
Internal locus of evaluation: the individual trusts their own experiences, feelings, and values to guide decisions. A typical indicator would be asking oneself: ‘I feel that this is good for me, it’s the right decision.’
As a result, we’re guided by our own organismic valuing process, another concept introduced by Rogers to mean paying attention to our gut feelings about what’s authentic and right.
External locus of evaluation: the individual relies on the opinions and feedback of others, cultural expectations, and social norms. It’s rooted in the introjected beliefs and values that have been come from cultural conditions, parents and peers, and become the individual’s truths.
Imagine someone who dreams of being an architect but, instead, contemplates entering medicine as a career to please their family. When they begin to ask: ‘Is this truly what I want?’ they move from an external validation to one of internal alignment. This is where the change gets under way.
Working with clients in a person-centred way
Person-centred counsellors use the core conditions of congruence, empathy and unconditional positive regard to help clients reconnect with their internal locus so they can build autonomy, emotional clarity, and self-trust.
Our locus of evaluation isn’t fixed, and we often sway and swing between both referent points depending on factors such as context, emotions, and life chapter.
The aim of therapy isn’t to encourage a rigid independence but a self-trust that’s flexible, and the ability to differentiate between external influences that are helpful and damaging.
This article first appeared on Substack 20 July 2026.